Lolo Knows

                 Picture I took a few years ago of Kim and her son Devin.  I woke up this morning and found out my girl, Kim, lost her son, Devin who I wrote about his fundraiser here for his brain cancer he was fighting. I am so saddened but needed to find ways in which parents and families close to the child can cope with this type of loss. I am a mother and can only imagine how they feel as I am now dealing with my mother that is battling a stage 4 cancer in her brain. I found the following on Cancer.net that not only can help her, but surely can help me cope as well.  No parent is prepared for a child’s death, even if you have anticipated it during your child’s illness. People have different reactions and feelings after the death of a child and may grieve the loss in different ways. Grief may come and go in waves throughout your life. Although it seems impossible, you can eventually let the loss become part of wh...

We live in a very busy world and there doesn't always seem to be enough time in the day to complete it all. People can even come off a little self absorbed and not really take in consideration that others are busy but have taken an opportunity to think about you while you were running around. Today's tasks may even in fact be there tomorrow. So, what's 5 minutes of your time to speak to the one that called you and thought about you in the midst of the chaos. It just might be God's way of telling you to slow down and never take for granted those other blessings that we often do and before you know it, we have lost a friend or family member because we got too busy to even give them that precious and most treasured time of the day to them. Instead we think that they will be there tomorrow or the next day. Folks, WAKE UP!!! Look around you and really observe who really is in your corner and make a conscience effort to stay there. What's up with the people that are too b...

This quote by Charlize Theron says it best. I never wished to be a single mom, but that is what I have been for 21 years and I have to say, it was the best years of my life. My mother got divorced from my father when I was 9 years old and she became a single mom. Having her as an example was the best lesson I could draw from to be the best mom to my boys to this day. It made me want to be better and sacrifice what I needed to, to give my sons the best time and life I could,  so that I could see them thrive better than I did in these conditions. This was my time to prove that not only I could do that, but love in a selfless place and put others needs before my own and grow me to the woman I am today. I am currently able to inspire a generation that would at least want to look at my example and feel that despite the dreams I have had as a little girl, the dream to give my boys what I didn't have manifested because giving to them was like giving to myself and it did pay off. I hav...

This quote is so true. I just saw two people going at it on social media and I told them to make a decision about their relationship and that this was not the place to do it.  That is child's play!! I also told them that my mother was diagnosed with cancer to hopefully put it all in perspective for them so that they could settle a matter that was close to their heart. My friend and artist, Arabella Proffer, and a guest I had on Lolo Knows, put it in perspective. She said she no longer worries about shit because cancer did that for her. Once you have had it and been through it whether physically or emotionally, it should really open up your eyes to what matters. I went through a break up that was difficult for me and my ex.  He wasn't well in  handling it because all he knew how to be was pissed and hurt until he felt he  no longer wanted to be that way. As we were going through an issue one day, at that very moment, I received a text from my sister, telling me a...

There was a time in my life when I was hanging out with all the wrong people. Let me be clear, they were awesome individuals, they just weren’t MY crowd. They didn’t get me, they liked to do all the things I really didn’t care to do and they talked about things I had no interest in. Hanging around with them made me feel drained, depressed and lonely. Lonely because I couldn’t make a connection with them around subjects that had meaning to me… Drained because I had to BE SOMEONE ELSE to fit in with who they were and what they wanted to do… Depressed because, well, it sucks to feel like you don’t fit in or like people just don’t GET you. Am I right? So how do you attract the RIGHT People into your life? Are you ready for this? Because it’s some seriously powerful stuff…  BE YOURSELF. 100% of the time and 100% REAL. If you think that you’re being real, but you’re still finding the wrong people showing up in your life, then you need to take a moment to reassess your YOU-ness. If the wr...

Arabella is a painter and co-founder of the indie label Elephant Stone Records. Her loose narrative themes revolve around a fascination with punk rock, aristocracy, Renaissance portraiture, aging socialites, gothic divas, and medical history. She attended Art Center College of Design in Pasadena, CA before receiving her BFA from California Institute of the Arts. She has participated in solo and group exhibitions throughout North America, as well as Europe, the Middle East, and Australia. Born in Ann Arbor, Michigan, she has taken up residence in Laguna Beach, Los Angeles, and Boston. She and her husband, writer Ben Vendetta, live on the shores of Lake Erie in Cleveland, Ohio. Her book  The National Portrait Gallery of Kessa: The Art of Arabella Proffer  was published in 2011 by Cooperative Press and she has appeared in The Wall Street Journal ,  The LA Times ,  The Plain Dealer ,  Cleveland Scene ,  Hi Fructose Magazine ,  Juxtapoz Magazine...

The only way two people can move on after there has been hurt is if there is a true apology followed by action. There is no amount of candy, flowers and I am sorry that will mask the wound if it isn't being treated properly to insure that the wound will ever reappear. It will   take a good deal of analyzing on your part so that you can pinpoint the factors that lead to the breakup to begin with. Only then can you   craft your own plan of getting that person back by “reverse-engineering” the relationship and every mistake that led to it falling apart. Time always heals, but that is all it will be especially if you expect the damage to just be ignored or disappear. Those damaging factors need to be gone for good in order to insure the strength, value and love you seek. Love doesn't go away in a day, but a person like myself  that values her own heart will love herself more than to ever think that her love wasn't worth you fixing and getting rid of the problem t...